But I Did Stay At A Holiday Inn Express Last Night
Kids do the darndest things. Sometimes, when they get older, they get stupider, and do things like drink too much. Occassionally, some drink so much that they don’t wake up. It sucks, but it happens. Has been for years. Probably hundreds.
But, not if a bunch of colleges & cities around the US have their way. Because, obviously the cause of this epidemic isn’t kids not knowing when to say when (very possibly a behavior learned at home in their youth in some cases)–the problem is drinking games.
Specifically, as of late, beer pong.
“Last fall, Georgetown University banned beer pong, specially made beer-pong tables and inordinate numbers of Ping-Pong balls and any other alcohol-related paraphernalia in its on-campus dorms – even in the rooms of students of legal drinking age.”
Next, the administration plans to outlaw quarters. No, not just the game–but the legal tender. Because it encourages drinking.
”Recent data from the Harvard School of Public Health’s College Alcohol study, which surveyed more than 50,000 students at 120 colleges, show that binge-drinking habits vary widely from campus to campus. Kids tend to party hardest at schools with few official alcohol-control policies, easy access to alcohol and strong drinking cultures.”
Let me get this straight–you spent money–presumably from a grant–to fund a study to tell you that binge-drinking habits vary from campus to campus, and that kids tend to party hardest at schools where there is easy access to booze and a reputation for drinking? What 3rd grader came up with that theory?
There was even a big kerfuffle when JV Games intended to release Beer Pong, a game for the Wii, under the Frat Party Games series–even Connecticut attorney general Richar Blumenthal got involved, sending letters to the company (and Nintendo), resulting in the game being re-named Pong Toss, and changing the beer in the cups to water in the game. Seriously. Nice use of state funds, there.
Oh, the changes also earned the game a kid friendly T for teen rating, and likely raised the publicity for the game, likely combining to expand the audience for the game. And here’s a news flash–kids likely still know what the original intent of the game was.
The logical response to that?
Last year, Dartmouth College banned water pong, the real-world version of Pong Toss, because of the risk of water intoxication.
I wish I was kidding.
“I know that [water pong] seems like a good balance between the Dartmouth drinking culture and just trying to have fun,” Kristin Deal, a Dartmouth community director, wrote in an e-mail to students announcing the prohibition. “However, it can be just as dangerous, if not more so.”
That’s right, kids–just remember, drinking is dangerous. Any drinking. It’s better to dehydrate yourself. Until we come up with a law against that.
Outlaw Beer Pong? What Am I Supposed to Turn Pro in Now? 1August2008
[...] to hold me back, by outlawing beer pong. And other drinking games. The theory? It will help curb binge drinking. In reality? Not so [...]